Jane. A Hip-Hop Saga. Part 1.

According to EPMD's seminal 1988 debut Strictly Business, the saga of "the fly girl with a haircut like Anita Baker" began sometime in 1986 when PMD turned up at E's house. E was trying to nail her friend and needed P to run some interferance. Now, the details from here on become a little murky, did both E and P go the menage-a-trois or did P roll dolo on that pussy. What i have gatherd is that jane wasn't satisfied, and by the time 1989 and EPMD's second album Unfinished Business rolled around she'd had a change of image.
P was coolin at the crib and thought he might hit a local club for a bit of dancing (it was spanish night after all) when he spotted a fly honey "lookin more like Whitney Houston" named Chris, who seemed rather impressed with P's Cadillac parked outside. Long story short, P and this broad named Chris slide back to the the crib and start gettin freaky when Chris remarks to P, "your the master, you've gottin bigger, better, stronger and much faster". All of which are issues Jane had had with P on Unfinished Business. Chris was "the J to the A to the N to the E". And as we leave P and E reeling from the realisation, we're told the story is to be continued.
In 1990 EPMD dropped thier third opus Business as Usual, and this is where things start to get a little wierd. A bloke by the name of Jay has moved into the neighbourhood (Brentwood Long Island i'm presuming), and seems cool enough to be put down with EPMD's crew The Hit Squad. He packs a 9milli a pet pitbull and has a nice crib although the hot pink decore leaves Eric and Parrish a little suspect. Any way P has to take a piss and finds a douche bag, leotards and numerous feminine products in Jay's bathroom. Of course P confronts Jay and an altercation and tussle ensues involving knifes, guns and karate upon which which Jay's true identity is revealed; Jane. Hearing the news E remarks, "did you go out like a sucker" to which P remarks, "nah, i took the moustache off grabbed that ass and i fucked her".
Wierd huh? After fucking this broad on a couple of occasions in the years prior neither Eric or Parish could work out that they'd just put a stalking transvestite in the crew... Maybe they're just not that observant.

What happens next between our hapless heroes Eric and Parrish and they're nemesis, on-again off-again root Jane... Tune in tomorrow for the climatic ending. Either that, or just listen to the next three albums ya bad delf.